❤️ Positivity ❤️

Hey guys !

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As the title of this post says, today I'm going to be talking about positivity and how important it is in every single person's life. I'm going to be frank with you- I'm not an expert at being and (more importantly) staying positive but in the past few months I have learned a lot through reading, listening and applying what I have learned to my every-day life. So, let's start from where my discovery of positivity began.

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Most of us have been through the hard years of being a college/sixth form students. To some these two years of education are the best years of their lives but for most it's a no man's land. I'm saying that because it's a period of time where a lot of people (or maybe just me) feel lost, disorientated and most of the time down about themselves, just because some other girl got a better mark on a math test and that makes you feel worthless. You start questioning: 'what's wrong with me? I was always amazing at everything in high school'. I felt the same way in the first year of college: lost, worthless and apathetic. I lacked motivation and didn't want to be in college any more. I wasn't even focusing on my grades and getting in to a good Uni because of how deep I had fallen into the endless cycle of procrastination I myself had created. When I had to write an assignment or a piece of coursework I would put it aside until the day it was due to be handed in. You know what was the worst part of this though, probably the fact that I always found an excuse to procrastinate and postpone every piece of work I was set and even if I felt guilty of it I didn't care because, after all, I was always "too tired to do anything". That was it. I kept saying to myself "I'm too tired. I need sleep". Yes I wasn't getting enough sleep but I would've been if I'd been on top of every obtrusive piece of work my teachers were setting me to do. Okay so what did I do? Hmmm... nothing up until late April. I tell myself that I'm going to be revising a lot the next day: "I'll go for it properly tomorrow" etc. But what I was doing instead? I was slacking off. Yes, even the exam pressure wasn't enough to get me out of this horrible cycle of procrastination. I just kept going round and round until one day I sort of "woke up" and realised there's nothing else left for me to do but cram everything in. Not the best of ideas- now I know. Here comes summer and what do I get? 2 C's, 2E's and a U. I only proved all of my teachers right that with too much on my shoulders (college and part time job) I would fail and I did. You know what though, I'm thankful for this because this situation opened up my eyes. Not only were my relatives and friends disappointed with me but I was disappointed with myself for never being brave enough to take action. You're probably here now thinking: 'but what does this have to do with positivity?'. It has a lot to do with it. At first I thought I became an unmotivated zombie because I lacked energy due to the work load and lack of sleep, and that is partly true. However the underlying cause of all this was my internal negative attitude and lack of positive energy in my life. There are many causes for why I was most of the time unhappy such as unresolved conflicts from the past which I have to live with up to this day and I still sometimes struggle, lack of purpose and long-term goals and abandonment of the creative part of me. These all contributed to my overall mental and physical ill-being.

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How did I overcome all this? I haven't completely overcome this yet because it's a process on which you have to work and put effort into. I am going back to college soon as I am in my last year now and I have planned everything in detail. Over the summer holidays I took a lot of time to detoxify my mind, brain (but not of the good knowledge of course) and body in order to start fresh and go through the next couple of terms with a positive and healthy mind. I decided that every week I'm going to write in my big calendar/organiser what I'm going to do each day in that week and that way I'll stay up to date with everything. However, I will also be focusing more on polishing my positivity through meditation, developing my creativity and smiling as much as I can. I am normally a smiley person but sometimes I don't realise that I smile only because I want to come across as polite and not because I want to feel internally and externally happy with myself. That will change now. Even if I'm in a bad mood I'll be trying to stay positive and solve the internal conflict by talking to someone or giving myself some time to think it over.

I know it's not going to be easy but trust me if you're in the same position as me where you have to resit most of your exams together with your A2's this is the best solution. In fact positivity is the best solution for everything. If you want your family and friends to be happy in your company you have to stay positive not only for them but for yourself because bad energy can be sensed and when you're aware that other people know that you're unhappy inside, you will drown in your unhappiness even more. This advice is not just for your college years but for the rest of your life. I definitely feel more positive now that I have shared this with you who are reading this post.

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'Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see a shadow'- Helen Keller

 

❤️Lots of love and positivity❤️